Photo by Christina Wiebolt

Embracing Shadow

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Grateful for Brave Participants

Hello friends,

Last week, I hosted the third retreat in my "Change Your Story" series, focused on the theme of "Our Shadow Selves." It was intense but gratifying, as each participant walked away with increased self-awareness.

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The Habit of Me

For those unfamiliar, the "shadow" represents the parts of ourselves often hidden from our view—the habitual ways we show up across different situations. In Eastern philosophy, it's called karma; Carl Jung called it Shadow. This unconscious programming drives our habits, emotions, impulses, and reactions. Shadow is tightly tied to our sense of self—who we are as we relate to ourselves, others, and the world.

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Two Kinds of Shadow

There are two kinds of Shadow: constructive and destructive. Constructive Shadow comprises our virtues, the healthy urges to share, care, and be fair. Destructive Shadow, meanwhile, is driven by our baser instincts—selfishness and hurtfulness. Our reactions reveal our internal makeup—moral contradictions, secrets, memories, and traumas.

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The Superpower of Self-Reflection

Yet, we all have the human superpower of focused intent, action guided by principle, and the resolve to change. Growth begins with an openness to positive influence and awareness—pausing and reflecting instead of shutting down or reacting defensively.

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Let's Practice This Week

This week, I invite you to try a mindfulness practice we engaged in at the retreat: Push, Pull, Stop, Neutral.

• Push Assertive energy to aggressively pursue wants and goals, sometimes at others' expense.
• Pull A needy energy seeking reassurance, attention, or validation.
• Stop Defensive, closed off, resisting engagement or change.
• Neutral Open, balanced, and non-judgmental—the ideal state for self-awareness and growth.

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It All Starts with Practice

Notice which energy is your habit this week. Reflecting on these easy-to-feel energies is essential shadow work. So simple. Give it a try, and let me know what you learn about yourself.

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Join Next Year's Group

If you are interested in possibly joining next year's Change Your Story, Change Your Life year-long, four-retreat series, click here, and let's talk about it.

Wishing you abundant health, happiness, and prosperity,

Mark.

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